July 25, 2012

• Whoa!

  So, yeah... Apparently I have more fans than I previously thought. And even more faithful than I ever realized. My mom is always my biggest fan, and most days I think she's my only one. I never thought for a moment that I had anyone else that may enjoy my rambles... So to each of you who messaged me and said you are a regular customer and to those who I offended in my last post: I sincerely apologize when I said no one reads my blogs!! I appreciate each of you who take the time to come and visit my ramblings and chaos called my life.

  I just want to get that order of business on the agenda first... You spoke, I heard! I cried a little and swelled up with a bit of pride for every message I got or likes on my personal Facebook. (I'm working on one for my alter ego-theJAYMEfiles-so that those of you who aren't a close friend or family (very Sheldon that way-no offence!) can see that there really is a wizard behind the curtain...) It made me realize that you do enjoy the small escape and makes me want to try harder to get this going a little more regularly...

  Hmm... what else... The job search continues. Still no bites. It's starting to really stress me out. I've gone into a few establishments to fill out applications there on the spot... I see the tiny glance down at the cane as I hand the paper back to them. At least they humour me in letting me fill the application out. *sigh* I'm trying not to be so negative, but for cryin' out loud! I'm not qualified for anything? Then how did I run an office for an investments company? (And it just wasn't the office; 4 personal properties and their own utilities, housekeeper, and visiting family and friends schedule...) I've filled out applications for the VA and still don't get a call... And doctors wonder why I don't have a job? It's not because I don't try; I just can't find anyone willing to take a chance on this disabled vet.

  I've been wrestling with myself on whether to put in for a new claim or not for my back. No one seems to be hearing me when I talk to them about the impact that this has taken on me, both physically and mentally. The only person that has in the last few years is the neurosurgeon at the VA in Kansas City. And while I did have a lady working with me in trying to get my case re-examined, I can't seem to get enough evidence to support my claims. Add to she has a million other life stuffs going on... This dog is getting tired and the bark is growing quite weary. OH! On top of everything, Social Security denied me again for disability. Because, apparently, there is nothing wrong with me. (Thanks to the docs I see and them writing down exactly what I'm NOT saying!) I'm getting so weary on this ride. Will someone please let me off so I can rest and not be so dizzy?

  Well, I can't just leave it on a down note like that... Let's see...

  Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.  ~Maya Angelou

  
  Yeah... I like Ms. Maya; she's an amazing person! So I leave you on that note... (Much better than my Debby Downer note, don't ya think?) Be well!

   

  Until next time... CIAO!
  

  • 12:22 am
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